Tag Archives: Family

Now on Kindle Unlimited: The Worst Jokes I Know (and I Know a Lot!)

The Worst Jokes I Know (and I Know a Lot!)Looking for some fun reading for the whole family? The Worst Jokes I Know (and I Know a Lot!): 101 Funny Bone Ticklers for Jokesters of All Ages is once again available for free through Amazon’s Kindle Unlimited program for a limited time.

Finding clean jokes that children of all ages can enjoy doesn’t have to be difficult!

B. Patrick Lincoln has supplied the need by collecting 101 family-friendly puns and riddles! Old jokes receive a new spin (Why is it inadvisable to read the contents of this book to an egg?), while original wordplay delights and entertains:

“I must here apologize for having organized such a book of horrid jokes. The problem is, I couldn’t help it. I’ve always been a joker—a card, you might say.”

Children will love sharing these jokes with their parents, grandparents, friends, and pun pals, while quirky illustrations add to the fun. Not only will the gift of clean humor connect generations, children will sharpen their logic and vocabulary skills as they practice their delivery. (And readers will finally have an answer to that nagging question of why the chicken really crossed the road.)

Share a laugh!

The Worst Jokes I Know is also available for purchase as a paperback. Find more information and free sample pages here.

10 Ways to Dress Up Boxed Macaroni and Cheese

10 Ways to Dress Up Boxed Macaroni and CheeseYes, we do our level best to eat right. We avoid highly processed foods, we put fresh fruits and vegetables on the table with every meal, and we even bake our own bread.

But when you live on a farm, sometimes the urgent takes top priority.

So what do you prepare for dinner when you’ve been moving livestock, running errands, or doing some other task that keeps you out of the kitchen?

Here’s a hint—start with boxed macaroni and cheese.

As America grows ever more real-food-conscious, our healthy eating options continue to increase. It is now quite possible to find boxed macaroni and cheese that is organic, whole-grain, carefully sourced—and affordable. This kind of macaroni and cheese frequently has the advantage of tasting like real cheese, too.

For the busy country family, then, it makes sense to keep a reserve supply of quality boxed macaroni and cheese in the pantry.

 

Mix It Up

While there are many varieties and flavors of real-food-based macaroni and cheese out there these days, sometimes a few extra (and very simple) touches makes all the difference between dinner in a hurry and a special treat. Whether you want to put more variety on the table or you want to beef things up a little for a family hungry after a day of hard work, these macaroni variations should help without adding too much extra time to the process:

  1. Serve with hot sauce.
  2. Stir in your favorite salad dressing.
  3. Add salsa. Homemade salsa is even better.
  4. Add sauteed all-natural turkey sausage and onions.
  5. Add your favorite shredded cheese and stir until melted.
  6. Combine with sauteed onion and fully cooked ground beef.
  7. Stir in pasta sauce, chopped onion, sliced olives, and sliced pepperoni.
  8. Top with leftover chili. Sprinkle with shredded cheddar. Serve with ketchup.
  9. Add taco seasoning (you can make your own, but that’s a subject for another post) and top with sour cream.
  10. Heat up leftover soup on the stove and stir in the contents of the cheese packet. Add the pasta and simmer until the noodles are completely cooked.

Enjoy!

$2.99 for a Limited Time Only—The Worst Jokes I Know

The Worst Jokes I Know (and I Know a Lot!)The Kindle edition of The Worst Jokes I Know (and I Know a Lot!): 101 Funny Bone Ticklers for Jokesters of All Ages by B. Patrick Lincoln is currently available from Amazon for $2.99—but only for a little while longer. Next week, the price will go back up to $4.49.

If you struggle to find clean, family-friendly humor that even youngest can share, The Worst Jokes I Know was created with you in mind.

These jokes were selected to connect generations with a good laugh. Lincoln has revived some old jokes with a new twist (Why is it inadvisable to read the contents of this book to an egg?) and added some wordplay of his own:

I must here apologize for having organized such a book of horrid jokes. The problem is, I couldn’t help it. I’ve always been a joker—a card, you might say.

Quirky illustrations add to the fun, while the puns and riddles themselves will help children expand their vocabularies and logic skills as they delight and entertain their families, friends, and pun pals. (And readers will finally have an answer to that nagging question of why the chicken really crossed the road.)

Free sample pages are available for download here.

Ready to give the gift of good, clean humor? The Kindle version of The Worst Jokes I Know is available for purchase here.

Free Today (November 14, 2018): The Worst Jokes I Know (and I Know a Lot!)

The Worst Jokes I Know (and I Know a Lot!)Did you get a chance to read The Worst Jokes I Know (and I Know a Lot!) for free last week? If not, we’ll give you another opportunity!

The Worst Jokes I Know (and I Know a Lot!) by B. Patrick Lincoln is a collection of 101 Funny Bone Ticklers for Jokesters of All Ages. Young jokers (cards, you might say) will learn side-splitting riddles and jokes, all in a small, illustrated book made to be shared. Kids will enjoy trying out corny wordplay on their family, friends, and pun pals.

For example:

A very prudent gardener planted dollar bills throughout his entire garden. One’s first thought might have been that he wanted to grow the mythical money tree. But no, the gardener knew better than that. He was merely trying to ensure that he had rich soil.

Fortified with an arsenal of good clean humor (including a few turkey jokes), your child will keep them all laughing at the Thanksgiving family gathering this year!

A paperback edition is also available. Download free sample pages here.

Free Today (November 5, 2018): The Worst Jokes I Know (and I Know a Lot!)

The Worst Jokes I Know (and I Know a Lot!)As the season slows down and Thanksgiving approaches, it’s time for fun and family! How about adding some humor to those cozy fall evenings?

The Worst Jokes I Know (and I Know a Lot!): 101 Funny Bone Ticklers for Jokesters of All Ages by B. Patrick Lincoln is free today on Kindle. This illustrated collection of clean puns and corny wordplay will answer those questions young jokers (cards, you might say) have always wanted answers for:

  • Why is it inadvisable to read the contents of this book to an egg?
  • Why was the ground delighted with the earthquake?
  • And why did the chicken really cross the road?

These clean jokes and riddles are suitable for children ages 4 through 104. After all, you’re never too old for a good joke.

A paperback edition is also available. Download free sample pages here.

Last Chance for a Free Joke Book

The Worst Jokes I Know (and I Know a Lot!)

Looking for some light summer reading that the whole family can enjoy? Now is your last opportunity to pick up The Worst Jokes I Know (and I Know a Lot!) by B. Patrick Lincoln for free!

This illustrated collection of 101 Funny Bone Ticklers for Jokesters of All Ages will be available for free to all on July 6 and 7 only! Pick up the free eBook for keeps, or read it with your subscription to Kindle Unlimited.

Children will love sharing clean humor with their friends, family, and pun pals as they find out the answers to important questions like:

Why is it inadvisable to read the contents of this book to an egg?

Why was the ground delighted with the earthquake?

And why did the chicken really cross the road?

After July 7, The Worst Jokes I Know will no longer be enrolled in the Kindle Unlimited program—so if you want to read it for free, now is your last chance.

Want to preview some sample pages? Click here for more information.

Happy summer!

Free 3 Days Only—The Worst Jokes I Know

The Worst Jokes I Know (and I Know a Lot!)Looking for clean humor that the whole family can enjoy? Here’s a chance to delight your children with the eBook version of The Worst Jokes I Know (and I Know a Lot!)—for free!

The Worst Jokes I Know by B. Patrick Lincoln is available free for all on May 2, 3, and 4. This is a great opportunity to pick up an illustrated collection of 101 Funny Bone Ticklers for Jokesters of All Ages. Readers young and old will enjoy finding out:

  • Why is it inadvisable to read the contents of this book to an egg?
  • Why was the ground delighted with the earthquake?
  • And why did the chicken really cross the road?

Kindle Unlimited subscribers will still be able to read the book for free until July 7.

A paperback edition is also available. Click here for more information and free sample pages.

Dear Readers and Riders

Dear Readers and RidersHave you ever wondered about the true stories behind Marguerite Henry’s books? If so, you may find the answers to your questions in Dear Readers and Riders.

In this book, Henry has answered many of the questions that her readers asked her in writing again and again. She has explained the facts, events, and characters surrounding such books as:

  • Misty of Chincoteague.
  • Stormy, Misty’s Foal.
  • Justin Morgan Had a Horse.
  • Brighty of the Grand Canyon.
  • Born to Trot.
  • Cinnabar, the One O’Clock Fox.
  • Five O’Clock Charlie.
  • Black Gold.
  • And others!

This is an excellent way to get a glimpse behind the scenes of the books, as Henry explains her extensive researches and her interviews with beloved characters. (You have to chuckle when Wesley Dennis compels the real-life Grandpa Beebe to shave his whiskers outdoors for an illustration!)

While most of the chapters are specific to Henry’s wonderful stories, a few involve her daily life and her thoughts on writing and being an author. She has also answered a few questions on keeping horses and other pets.

This book is out of print and can be pricey, so see if your library can get a copy. For dyed-in-the-wool Marguerite Henry fans, young and old, it’s a must!